Common Denominator

Situations, relationships, people, places, things – basically all your nouns – they change. They change every day. Sometimes you notice. Sometimes you don’t. Sometimes you make a choice for change, and sometimes change happens without your consent.

What I find interesting is how often it isn’t “change” at all; but rather a rerun of your life in syndication. Déjà vu, you wonder?

No. It’s just vous.

Since obviously there’s nothing crazy about you, think of that one crazy friend, ex-girlfriend, co-worker, sister, neighbor – whatever, the Crazy Girl. We all know one. Her business manager may be a psychic? She has an excuse or reason for everything bad that happens in her life and it’s all external. Someone else is responsible for her current state. She’s just trying to do the best, most right thing and she keeps getting punished for it.

*eyeroll*

Crazy Girl’s life is a dull collection of repeated “errors in judgment” which can certainly be twisted about in order to place the blame soundly on someone else. Sadly, but inevitably, the willing world can see the many iterations of the same behavior… and Crazy Girl is always in the big ole middle of it. She created it or assisted it, and was probably looking for a different outcome every time. Definition of insanity, right?

For all of the relationships, bad fashion decisions, and lost drunken weekends, there’s a common denominator. Only one person was there every time. In Crazy Girl’s life, it’s her. In your life, it’s you. That’s right. You’re your own common denominator.

I like to blame my occasionally less than stellar decision-making on the multitude of voices in my head – which at least one of whom believes is totally valid. However, when I look in the mirror, it’s just me. Since I’m not afraid to own my life, actions, or decisions it’s easier to tell the world to “piss off” if need be; apologize when I’ve actually done something hurtful (as opposed to those things I didn’t do but that are nonetheless a very real part of someone else’s imagination), and get a decent night’s sleep.

Stop pushing your retrospectively embarrassing decisions or misdeeds off on everyone else. You did it. You get to own it. If you don’t like your behavior – change it. If you don’t like my behavior, have the balls to say that to me and stop acting like a spoiled little bitch. No one is ruining your happiness but you.

[sidebar: wow… vicious. But I’ll own it. I’ll also share that after I typed it I realized it didn’t come from my usual hypothetical place, but instead was actually directed somewhere… somewhere male. Perhaps I should get off this healthy living thing to ensure I don’t see so clearly... Waiter!]

Embrace yourself before you run out of people who will. Remind yourself that not everything that happens around you is about you. Never forget that you are the only common denominator in your life, so choose your environs carefully.

“And acceptance is the answer to all of my problems today…”