Pride and Dignity

My girlfriend Marti recently posed the following question:
“With no holes barred, serious or funny… what’s the one thing you’d never want to go a day without? You can only pick one thing, and it cannot be a person.”

*thinks*
*taps fingernail incessantly on mouse *
*thinks*

Hours passed while I contemplated this. I’m a fairly simple creature, crazy hair aside. There are very few things in my life that are indispensable.

*sighs*

Okay….
Coffee? Too obvious.
Vodka? We don’t put that sort of thing into The Universe.
The joy that is my job? *choke* Ha! Not doing that with a straight face.

I returned to Marti’s page to see what other people were saying. It was a little bit like cheating, but then, I didn’t have any ideas of my own so I figured, what’s the harm?

Diet Mountain Dew; toilet paper; laughter (*eyeroll*); cell phone… and then, jackpot! There it was, in all caps: “MY SELF-RESPECT!!!” with yes, three exclamation points.

*snicker*
Seriously? Who thinks like that?

As far as I’m concerned, as long as you can live with your actions, it’s really no one else’s business how you go about it, as long as you’re not hurting anybody. Yes, I think we should all treat ourselves well, be forgiving of our shortcomings, and lead balanced lives – but I’m not your mother. Drink yourself stupid, smoke yourself unconscious; eat your way into a stupor; turn on your red light and call yourself Roxanne for all I care. If you can live with it; I can live with it… or choose not to and remove myself.

How many times have you heard someone snarl, “Where’s her self-respect?” at a person they already talk shit about? Like we need one more way for blowhards to belittle the actions of people they don’t value in the first place. And who’s in charge of the self-respect yardstick anyway? I imagine hookers have self-respect based on their skill-set. What makes theirs different from anyone else’s? Where is the panel of judges here, and what are the criteria?

No one can take something like self-respect away from you! You can certainly give it away… but take it? It’s not a car, an empty cocktail glass, or your virginity. We make our own choices – even when it feels like we don’t have one. You’re not allowed to blame someone else if you throw yourself under the bus. Choosing to stay on the sidewalk, now that’s self-respect!

Returning to the original question, and with everyone else’s answers in mind, I crafted my response… sort of:

Q:
“With no holes barred, serious or funny… what’s the one thing you’d never want to go a day without? You can only pick one thing, and it cannot be a person.”

A:
“I don’t know what it is, but I know it’s not my self-respect, because apparently that’s been sitting at the bar alongside my pride and my dignity for some years now.”

Don’t judge. At least I know where mine are!