Goin' Fishin'

I love to hear carbon-copied people actually proclaim they're unique; somehow different from everyone else, as though saying it will make it true. Cripes, look around. Dress alike, talk alike, walk alike.

I'm not wrong. Sure, that stupid hitch-strut with the underdrawers showing started with one guy, but I'd bet it wasn't intentional. More likely the fallout from wearing his bigger brother's pants. And now! Now we're apparently stuck with a freakish number of "unique" men and boys doing it until such time as some mishap overtakes a celebrity gait.

And while I'm thinking about it, the cocked gimme-cap? That came from some kid's mom slapping him up the back of his head.

Human herd instinct reminds me of schools of fish... and smells just as bad. What? Everyone is going this way? I'd better go, too! Hems up; hems down; fancy tights; bare legs; she hates him so everyone else follows suit; I think I might be blonde this summer!

It makes my head visibly reel. In an effort to purge this Dramamine-required topic from my brain, I did some mulling and determined that ultimately, we can break this down into two distinct fishy follower schools:

Salmon.
They're planning to "do" something so they've identified the purpose of running with a crowd. Their single-mindedness should be considered suspect at all times. The good news here is that, percentage-wise, 40% of those upstream spawning slippery fish are eaten by the predatory bear or killed off in some other natural way. You'll occasionally find "school leaders" (people version identified readily as just the loudest-not-the-smartest in what is still a crowd) who perform around their own personal agenda, always acutely aware that there's safety in numbers...

Cavefish.
They're just the spineless, blind followers... literally. They lack eyes of their own so they rely wholly on the sounds, or talk, around them to survive. They just swim along in an effort to be a part of something - anything - and are an excellent example of regressive evolution. The people version of the cavefish was probably chosen last for whatever and still takes it as a personal affront. They'll go, do, or say anything to be included. Luckily the cavefish is harmless and appears to serve no real purpose.

There're plenty of pack-mentality analogies to be made here, but I'm already bored. I suppose the point is that it's not difficult to actually be who you are, instead of one of them. Here's the list as I see it:

1. The "in crowd" isn't really in. Popularity is gained and retained by individuality.
2. It's only okay to be "loud" if you have something to say. Otherwise, you're just... loud. *cringe*
3. Make one statement every day. I chose a crazy combination of orange shirt, purple sweats, and a yellow cardigan because I DO have a choice!
4. Don't be afraid that others won't understand your truths. They don't need to get it; just respect it.
5. Let your heart, not the thoughts, ideas, or the fish stories of others guide your behavior.

Salmon, cavefish, or something else altogether; if it looks like a fish and swims like a fish, it will most likely smell like a fish. Be a bear today!

Postscript:
I know you could normally come here on a Sunday and find a new post; however, I'm taking this weekend off to go in search of new material. I don't know exactly where this will take place, but the calendar is full so if the planets align, I'm golden. If not, may The Universe save us all from whatever my fingers have to say.